The first step in deciding what are the best zombie movies requires the rather delicate matter of determining what in fact are zombies. The common short hand of calling them the reanimated or walking or living dead isn't quite sufficient. After all, vampires would thereby qualify, too. And them vampires, they ain't no zombies, no way, no how. To determine what qualifies as a zombie, we will need some rules to set the parameters.
Of course it's something of a cliche to observe that rules are made to be broken. That may be so and without question even the rules of zombie movie conventions have not been rigorously observed. Despite this fast and loose playing with the rules, some enduring conventions can be identified. Exercising a little flexibility in discussing them should keep us out of too much conceptual hot water, while allowing us to set some parameters.
In looking at these zombie movie conventions it is useful to distinguish between the pre and the post Romero zombies. We can conclude by identifying, too, some of the standard narrative rules of zombie movies.
The Pre Romero Zombies
1. The original idea of zombies comes from notions of Haitian voodoo and the pre-Romero movies often followed this archetype so that such zombies would have a master that controlled them as a function of having raised them from the grave.
2. Already in this early period it was common that zombie ambulation was characterized by slow, unbalanced motion.
3. Even the pre-Romero movies had already developed the narrative trope of setting the zombie uprising (if you'll excuse the pun) in some kind of an apocalyptic scenario. Nihilism was the aesthetic of the day. Or night.
4. These earlier films also commonly depicted zombiism as the manifestation of a plague.
Romero/post-Romero Zombies
5. Among Romero's enduring changes was that the zombies ceased to be in the control of some master-mind. Instead, now, zombies more closely resembled an act of god or natural disaster. It has become common currency that in fact the rise of zombies constituted some kind of retribution by nature against some alleged ecological evil of human action.
6. These new zombies had an apparently insatiable hunger for human flesh.
7. Romero completely re-imagined the zombie attack as a bloody gore fest, almost lovingly depicted in graphic cinematic detail.
8. And possibly the most enduring of Romero's revision of the zombie mythology was the idea that they could only be "killed" by a skull crashing blow of some sort that damaged their brain.
9 Though, as seen above, the idea of zombiism as a plague was older, the Romero tradition made standard the convention that it was passed by zombie bites.
Stock ingredients for a zombie movie
10. Almost invariably all zombie movies require some pathetic bummer character who whom, as a consequence of stupidity, selfishness, cowardice or general all purpose inhumanity, brings the previously withheld zombie horde down upon the poor straggling survivors. This person's characteristically anti-social behavior serves the symbolic function of being the weak link in the fortifications that had previously protected a small safe space.
11. Straggling survivors, usually with a rainbow-like ethnic, gender and age mix, who capture in microcosm the hope and futility, dignity and venality, of the humanity that is in all likelihood about to be wiped out.
12. The "what's happening" factor. Always in the beginning, no one seems to be able to figure it out. Despite the rather large number of zombie movies, it always appears as though zombie movies take place in a world where no one has even seen one. And certainly no public official ever has. They just can't figure it out!
13. Zombie movies in fact are not about the danger of zombies, but about the danger of humans.
14. Usually there has to be some sad sack who just doesn't get it, not able to let go of an emotional attachment to one of the zombies. Somehow, with all the crazy flesh eating and so forth, they can't quite get with the idea that the former loved one has become a cannibalistic ambulating corpse. This rarely goes well for the sad sack.
15. And we need the hero, or as close to one as we get. This will be the peace maker and noble leader by example, sacrificing everything to pull straggling survivors together. It is their only hope, after all. Yet, invariably such efforts are thanked by a reliably obnoxious jerk accusingly commenting "who made you the boss?"
16. And let us not forget the attractions of the love-interest. Among the ragtag of humanity there will be reliably at least one hottie of each gender. No doubt part of the attraction of zombie movies for many fanboys is the projected excitement that finally now some hot babe will have to have sex with me. I mean, the future of humanity depends upon it. As observed, though, the hotties are usually represented in both genders. So, just like high school, there's still some alpha type messing up your plans. But, hey, at least there's some faint hope, right? What's the point of a zombie apocalypse if it's not going to give you some hope to make out with a babe who wouldn't give you the time of day in study hall?
So, there you go; there's our 16 rules for identifying zombies and their movies. Now, next time you're asked about the best zombie movies , you know what you're talking about!
Of course it's something of a cliche to observe that rules are made to be broken. That may be so and without question even the rules of zombie movie conventions have not been rigorously observed. Despite this fast and loose playing with the rules, some enduring conventions can be identified. Exercising a little flexibility in discussing them should keep us out of too much conceptual hot water, while allowing us to set some parameters.
In looking at these zombie movie conventions it is useful to distinguish between the pre and the post Romero zombies. We can conclude by identifying, too, some of the standard narrative rules of zombie movies.
The Pre Romero Zombies
1. The original idea of zombies comes from notions of Haitian voodoo and the pre-Romero movies often followed this archetype so that such zombies would have a master that controlled them as a function of having raised them from the grave.
2. Already in this early period it was common that zombie ambulation was characterized by slow, unbalanced motion.
3. Even the pre-Romero movies had already developed the narrative trope of setting the zombie uprising (if you'll excuse the pun) in some kind of an apocalyptic scenario. Nihilism was the aesthetic of the day. Or night.
4. These earlier films also commonly depicted zombiism as the manifestation of a plague.
Romero/post-Romero Zombies
5. Among Romero's enduring changes was that the zombies ceased to be in the control of some master-mind. Instead, now, zombies more closely resembled an act of god or natural disaster. It has become common currency that in fact the rise of zombies constituted some kind of retribution by nature against some alleged ecological evil of human action.
6. These new zombies had an apparently insatiable hunger for human flesh.
7. Romero completely re-imagined the zombie attack as a bloody gore fest, almost lovingly depicted in graphic cinematic detail.
8. And possibly the most enduring of Romero's revision of the zombie mythology was the idea that they could only be "killed" by a skull crashing blow of some sort that damaged their brain.
9 Though, as seen above, the idea of zombiism as a plague was older, the Romero tradition made standard the convention that it was passed by zombie bites.
Stock ingredients for a zombie movie
10. Almost invariably all zombie movies require some pathetic bummer character who whom, as a consequence of stupidity, selfishness, cowardice or general all purpose inhumanity, brings the previously withheld zombie horde down upon the poor straggling survivors. This person's characteristically anti-social behavior serves the symbolic function of being the weak link in the fortifications that had previously protected a small safe space.
11. Straggling survivors, usually with a rainbow-like ethnic, gender and age mix, who capture in microcosm the hope and futility, dignity and venality, of the humanity that is in all likelihood about to be wiped out.
12. The "what's happening" factor. Always in the beginning, no one seems to be able to figure it out. Despite the rather large number of zombie movies, it always appears as though zombie movies take place in a world where no one has even seen one. And certainly no public official ever has. They just can't figure it out!
13. Zombie movies in fact are not about the danger of zombies, but about the danger of humans.
14. Usually there has to be some sad sack who just doesn't get it, not able to let go of an emotional attachment to one of the zombies. Somehow, with all the crazy flesh eating and so forth, they can't quite get with the idea that the former loved one has become a cannibalistic ambulating corpse. This rarely goes well for the sad sack.
15. And we need the hero, or as close to one as we get. This will be the peace maker and noble leader by example, sacrificing everything to pull straggling survivors together. It is their only hope, after all. Yet, invariably such efforts are thanked by a reliably obnoxious jerk accusingly commenting "who made you the boss?"
16. And let us not forget the attractions of the love-interest. Among the ragtag of humanity there will be reliably at least one hottie of each gender. No doubt part of the attraction of zombie movies for many fanboys is the projected excitement that finally now some hot babe will have to have sex with me. I mean, the future of humanity depends upon it. As observed, though, the hotties are usually represented in both genders. So, just like high school, there's still some alpha type messing up your plans. But, hey, at least there's some faint hope, right? What's the point of a zombie apocalypse if it's not going to give you some hope to make out with a babe who wouldn't give you the time of day in study hall?
So, there you go; there's our 16 rules for identifying zombies and their movies. Now, next time you're asked about the best zombie movies , you know what you're talking about!
About the Author:
Now that you know what qualifies as a zombie movie, check out Mickey Jhonny's provocative top five list of the all time best zombie movies . Over at the Walking Dead appreciation blog, Pretty Much Dead Already, his article on the Walking Dead fanfiction is required reading for all aficionados of the zombie genre.
